15 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Said “I Do”

F2FA April 22, 2016

UPTOWN_couple_arguing_over_bills

Money 

One of you will be a spendthrift while the other will be stingy or prudent. No surprises, it’s how you were raised. One of you needs to be able to balance the books monthly, though, to avoid getting bankrupt. A great advantage of a joint account is that it keeps the couple accountable; with separate accounts, affairs could be easily funded. Whether you decide on a joint account or not, it’s not as important as being open and honest with each other. There are still guys who are insecure if their wives earn more than they do. Some even tell their wives not to work or engage in any business. They want to be in control. One last tip: don’t be under any pressure from your family or the society to keep up with the Joneses; learn to live below your means.

No perfect spouse 

Prince Charming and Cinderella still had their weaknesses and vulnerabilities, so who says you or your spouse is supposed to be perfect? Can you believe that a guy who’s very romantic in the daylight snores in bed at twilight? That a lady who is a high flyer at work may be unable to cook nourishing meals for her husband? That the guy you think has got it altogether has some dark secret you don’t want to know about? Accepting the mixed bag of your spouse’s strengths and weaknesses will be a great help to getting some stability in your relationship. There’s no perfect marriage. You might think you’re both having terrible times, but you’re not the only ones. Many other marriages are struggling, and what’s working for you might even be hurting others.

Sex

Sex is a great way to connect with your soulmate, but it feels different after the kids are here. The dynamics change as you both age. It’s tough to keep up quality time together with fatigue and hectic work schedules. Guys think about it a lot more than the ladies: they want it anytime and anywhere, while ladies need to feel loved and cherished to enjoy it. With many couples tasting the secret pudding before D-day, the appeal and excitement is most times lost. Those who have been abused at an early age often struggle to connect with their spouses too, as buried wounds still remain sore.

Last Edited by:Sandra Appiah Updated: April 22, 2016

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