Alnissa hadn’t reached out to her mother in two years before attempting to reconcile. She bravely drove 37 hours across the nation to surprise her in a viral TikTok video with over a million views.
Describing her difficult relationship with her mother, Alnissa said her mother fell pregnant with her when she was 17 years old and gave birth when she was 18. The relationship that Alnissa’s mother entered after Alnissa’s parents separated turned violent for both of Alnissa and her mother.
Alnissa felt ignored and mistreated as a result of the rough past, which created a tense relationship later in life.
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She told People, “I stayed away for a while … when she got out of the marriage, it was like, ‘Oh, that never happened. These things never happened.’ She did that often, likely to protect the siblings that I had that came out of that relationship. And so the coverage was there for my siblings, but the coverage wasn’t really there for me, and so that really hurt me.”
Still, her mother constantly checked in through her grandma, expressing she wanted to get back in touch.
Alnissa is now thinking about moving closer to her mother from California to Virginia to improve their bond and make new memories together.
She expressed her thoughts in a second TikTok, claiming that it was a “no-no” for her to speak about the “level of abuse” she had received and that, finally, “I kind of just stayed away from it.”
But when Alnissa accepted a second job as a security guard, working night shifts across from a cemetery, it was a game-changer for her.
“You get a lot of time to think,” she stated, “and you start thinking about memories.”
After several nights of reflecting, Alnissa decided to reconsider her approach and go see her mother.
With her husband’s help, she drew $3,000 from their funds to fund the trip. His continuous encouragement significantly impacted her decision.
She explained, “He said, ‘Let’s do it.'” And that really just spoke to me about what kind of person he is and how much he loves me.”
She characterizes her journey as physical and emotional. It was a 37-hour drive for Alnissa and her family, which included her two daughters.
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They arrived at the perfect time—her mother was strolling across the street from where they had parked.
But the reunion exceeded all expectations.
“I just didn’t know how she was going to react,” Alnissa recalled. “I didn’t know if she was really going to be excited to see me or what was going to happen.”
“And when she took off running towards me, I just couldn’t even describe how I felt,” she continued. “I wanted to break down and cry, but she was crying for the both of us, so I was kind of just like, I’ll save it for later.”
Alnissa now sees forgiveness as personal healing. According to her, it doesn’t always mean that “you’ll allow that person in your space and in your life. Forgiveness is for you, not for them. It’s about deciding what’s best for you and doing what’s healthy for you.”
She can connect with her mother more deeply now that she has this fresh viewpoint. She feels she can relate to what she has to say and wants to get to know her further. She also hopes that her mother will become more involved in her children’s lives as their grandmother.
Alnissa and her family are thinking of living closer together in the future.
She said, “Being closer to her and moving closer would definitely help to be able to build memories. Because there’s only so much that you can do over the phone until it’s like, okay, I need another hug. I need another kiss.”
